finally & slowly..i've learn to accept things & let it go slowly..

i realise..im beginning to accept things slowly..
like the person whom i love him as a brother so much..
was called home to be with Lord..
i accept that his has no longer here..
i begin to realise..
not all things we wish to hv can be ours..
its just like when u learn to walk & u fall..all u need is to get up on ur own
& walk again..
its all thanx to casey..
the man who washed out all my darkness..
and lighted it with his light and fire..
giving me the warm and comfortable..
being with him is really different from being with my ex..
from him..
i've learn to let go things that hard to let go..
from him..
i know what loves call..
being love doesnt seem to be the same..
he has showered me with his love and warm..
and thats what i always wished n wanted..
may he always shower me with his love and warm..
till the end of my life..
even in the next world..
all i want is him..
yep yep..
i am greedy..
greedy for his love and warm..
so what?
im not greedy of his fortunes..
i love him for who he is..
thats my aim..
get all his love n warm..
and own him all by my own..
i would love to let him own me all by himself too...
well i dont know what made me love him so so much..
but seriously..
hes the man..
im really inlove with..
a man whom i always dream for..
i love his smile..
i love his laughter..
i love his voice..
i love the way he is..
his everything perfect to me..
his my baby..
forever and ever baby ^^
i love to cuddle n hug him so much..
its just too warm to get away from him..
love to stick around him..
especially climbing n rolling on him..
his so so nice to be hug..
tho i see him in webcam n hug my pillow as if im hugging him..
the warm always there..
aww..
what a lovely hug!!!
i love to be cuddle n carry by him..
spinning around with him makes me smile more
and laugh alot..
i love him so so much..
may our marriage always turn blossom..
till the end of our life..
just me n him..
kim & casey
forever..

Little Angel begins to realise...

mom is right,im no longer a little angel..im growing..
growing into adult stage..2 more years i will be 20..
now,im almost reaching my mature stage that is 18th..
still im like a little playful angel,need attention from friends n family
and of course from my love..Casey..
mom told me,when will i ever change into a mature girl?
but the truth,i dont even know the answer too..
am i still childish?
i think i am..
mostly bcause i always love to be a baby to Casey..
but i do always think abt my life with Casey..
New life..
New family..
New born child..
and all i know i cant wait to get marry to Casey..
and i really want him to own me as soon as possible..
My love for him is getting stronger..
No one knows it
No one understands it
Only i know that i love him more than anything..
saying abt mature..
am i not mature??
if im not mature..
will i think abt getting marry with Casey?
or have kids with him?
of course i wont..
ppl who arent mature will never think abt tht..
mommy never understand me..
only one person who ever knew me deeply now..
and tho we r still chatting in msn..
yet he knows my character almost..
i love him so much..
and his the last man i ever wanna be with..
till the end of my life..
someday..
someday ppl will know..
why i love him..
as he is so special to me..
someday..
my parents wil know what made me love him that much..
someday..
the day will come..

U showered me with ur love..

u showered me with ur love,
u made me feel im wanted..
what we had gone through together
has made me realise how important
u are to me..
thank u for loving me
for who i am..
i may not hv anything to give u
but i could only afford to shower
u with my love..
forgive me if i hv hurt ur feelings..

forgive me if i couldnt afford to give u what u wanted..

One whole night he hasnt been on..

Have u ever felt what is the feeling
when suddenly he (ur love) didnt come online
as usual?
It feels painful...lonely..hurt..empty..
that is what I was going through one whole night..
Sleepless..
As because I'm use to when I'm asleep
hes by my side..
But last night..
He wasnt on at all..
I couldnt even sleep..
I barely closed my eyes..
Tears streaming down when each time I
turn myself facing the laptop..
He wasnt there..
Even u tried to pretend hes there..
But still it wont work,
because hes really isnt there..
I beginning to realise that I
cant live without him..
Even one day without seeing him
I feel pain in the heart..
The pain was like u were being stabbed..
by a sharp knife..
I'm feeling dissapointed...
And yet..
I have to go to school to sit for my last final exam paper
with the feeling of upset...
pain..
and empty..

I wrote a poem about LOVE.....

I wrote a poem about LOVE..
Which I hope it will last forever even we are apart..
I wrote your name on the sand..
But the waves washed it away..
I wrote your name on my diary..
But it was torn away..
I wrote your name in my heart..
Which I know it will last forever..
I wrote again your name,
On the rainbow..
To let the whole world know how special you are to me..
But one thing I want you to know,
It last FoReVeR..
Thank you for being such a perfect love to me..
And I hope we will never say good bye..

The day he met me,His Life totally CHANGED....

The day I met him,

Things totally changed..
Feelings begin to grow day by day..
Love @ first sight..
I begin to know I fell in love with him..
He,
Almost died for what he thinks in his mind..
He,
Who thought his life is worthless..
He,
Who thinks no one will ever love him..
He,
Who thinks it is the end of the world for him..
He,
Who had been through hard life..
He,
Who never smile for 3 years..
He,
Who thinks he should die..
A man like him,
Who has the heart of love for a woman..
And not all woman could ever find a man like him..
A man like him never exist anymore..
Even if u are willing to pay millions,billions of cash..
Just to find a man like him..
U still never ever get..
He may be rich,
But,If the woman who love him just because for his cash..
It's better u dont have to love him..
As he has feeling too because his a human too..
Love a man not because of his cash,
But love him for who he is..
Not what he has..
He is the man u will never ever can find..
A man who showers u with his love,
A man who cares u more than anything..
A man who will tolerate a woman's tempered...
All I want him to know is I always love him..
He is the man I always dreamed of..
A man who shower me with his love n joy..
A man who loves to carved a smile on me..
A man who wipes away my tears..
A man who protects me from danger..
A man who takes away my fear..
His my everything ..
I only think of him..
Trying to keep our relationship last..
Trying to hold him tight..
Never wanna let him go..
I found out and realise that I've grown alot..
Ever seen he came into my life..
He lead me to a mature world..
He made me realise what is diff..
Accepting the way I am..
He has a beautiful smile..
A nice warm voice..
That I adore alot..
He is perfect..
Hmm..
He is my true love..
My Boo..
My Baby..
My Hunny..
Even million or billion cant buy him..
He is cherish now..
I've never seen his so happy..
I mean,
The day I met him..
He wasnt the person I'm knowing now..
He loves to laugh..
He loves to joke around..
He is a perfect man now..
And I know I'm loving him alot now..
Without him..
I'm nobody..
At least..
I know..
He made me mature..
He made me grown up..
He made me learned to accept everything..
Abt me..
Abt the world..
And everything...
Thank u so much to him..
He made me think everything..
He made me feel happy alot..
All I want from him is..
May he always be happy..
This is all I ask from him..
I love u baby..
Now,Future,Forever..
U r the 8th and the last..
No one else..
Can ever replace u
In
My
Life..
Never

Now I know what my answer is..

After all we have gone through together..
I finally had my answer from my heart..
U r the only one I'm loving now..
U r the person I care..
And I realised u hv done many things to hv me..
U showed me the power of love..
U showed me what love calls..
And what will ppl do for their love one..
U opened my eyes..
And I finally saw it..
U cared me so much..
And I never felt that love feeling before..
After my ex gone..
Finally I know,
I found my true love..
U said,
In my life I needed u in it..
U determined to win it..
U know what I needed..
U know what's wrong..
U know how to make it tight..
Everything will be alright..
If I let u hold me..
And let u introduce ur world to me..
And introduced me to the better side of life that
i aint been seeing..
U'll show me how to get it..
All I got to be with and
let u hold me..
When I cry,
U wanna feel my pain..
No secrets,No games..
All excitement,Nothing plain..
Keep me happy thats ur aim.
U wanted me to have ur child..
U wanted me to be in ur life..
U showed me how important I am in ur life..
U proved to me that I never be alone..
U proved to me u loved me more than anything..
Many hard task we gone through together..
Finally I had the answer for u..
I love u so much and I'm willing to give u my heart..
U can have my heart 100%..
U can own me by urself..
No one shall take me away from u..
I finally know that I love u..
And I needed u in my life..
U gave me the warm I always look for..
U gave me to happiness I always wanted..
I'm urs now..
Forever and ever shall be urs..
I love u

I'm Beginning To Grow Up..Realising About What Love Is About....

I always thought I know everything about love..
But I realised I'm wrong..
I realised that only now I know what love is..
The feelings I never ever felt after all the love life I've been through..
With different guys..
The feeling of being dump being left is really hurt and painful..
But then I realised again,
Being dump or being left..
It means we dont belong together..
And sometimes the feeling isnt right for the couple..
Now,I realise who I'm loving and who I really care..
I'm hving a strong feeling that I'm inlove with him..
A guy who gave me the love I've never had before..
Day by day,the missing feeling grows stronger,
the love feeling towards him grows stronger too..
I realise he is the one I'm loving so much,
He taught me everything patiently,
Even I'm a hot tempered girl,
He still tolerates me patiently..
His my everything..
He guides me slowly..
He tells me what I always fear abt..
Giving me confidence..
Giving me everything I want in his life..

The Love that i dont wanna lose...

The person whom i care alot now is him..
His my everything..
My light..
My soul..
My happiness..
My life..
My love..
My heart..
My sun..
A person who pours his love on me fully..
A person who cares me so much..
A person give me the safe feeling that can be with..
From top to toe of his..
Everything looks perfectly..
Bright Shining eyes whenever he smiles..
Soft lips that carved with lovely smiles too..
A warm body to be hugged..
A warm pair of hands to be cuddled in..
Soft ears to be play with..
lovely hair to be touched & play with..
Warm chest to be lied down on..
Secure feelings around him..
We are just so in love..
No love has ever made me feel this way..
So special,boy it's him..
His smile..and i just cant get enough of his love..
I want him to know..
His my baby love my baby love..
He makes the sun comes up..
His my everything that i could ever dream of..
His makes the sun comes up..
His my every every everything..
He makes me,so crazy,it's crazy..
Ohh hunny..
I don't wanna be with no one else..
His the only one that ever made me melt..
His special,boy it's his,his style..
Love..
I want him to know..
His my baby love..
My every every everything in my life..

the way he feel he always hide from me,when it comes to the feeling of hurt n sad..

sometimes whenever the one u love feeling sad n hurt,they never ever wanna tell u..

and when it is abt between the two of them,and u say something or u rejects what he say or ask for..the sense of guilt when u rejects his request..the feeling of pain comes to ur heart n begin to make u feel how he feels..these feelings u will feel when u really loves the one u love..especially when u see them unhappy..

i love to see when his happy..but not when it comes to sad part. he gives me the love i want.. he gives the warm i always looked for.. he is the one.. the one true love i found.. loving him is my wish...

I love the way u are..

{My Baby Boo Casey Brendon}

I love the way u smile..

I love when u laugh..

I love everything of urs..

The warm u give me..

The comfort u give me..

The kiss..

The whispering at my ear..

The breathing at my neck..

The touch from ur finger..

The body of urs for me to hug..

Everything..

I love it all..

Everytime i see u smile it makes me feel happy..

Everytime u stare or look at me my heart beats fast n fast..

U make me blush easily..

U make me shy easily..

I love the way u look like..

U are the perfect guy i ever loved..

The guy i always dream to be with..

U lighted my life..

U brighten my life..

U shower me with ur love..

U cover me from danger..

U secure me from harm..

The way u love me i've never got it..

Tho i had it twice but then it is the past..

New life with u..

New future with u..

Baby,u know how much i love u..

Because u showed me what loves is..

I thought i would never fall in love again..

But i was wrong since i found n met u..

U are always my love one..

The only one i love alot..

No one can ever replace u..

Never..

I love u casey..

RIP Brother..

my beloved god brother..the one n only..

was called to be back with Lord..

its a big lost..i loved him so much..

brother..may u rest in peace..

u will always be in my mind...

Endless Love...

lol,he looks younger than me...
of course his younger..
im 17++ n his 16..
2 years younger
but damn mature than me..
geezz..
my friends said i look like a younger sis to him
but actually he supposed to be my lil bro..
giggles..
mm,love..
i loovvee hhiimm soo soo soo soo much!!!
omg his all over in my mind..
i love him i love him i love him so so much
wish he was here now so we dont hv to online to talk..
i might be playing with his hair by now..
lol...
love to play his hair and touch him..
gently touching him and feel his warm when he hugs me..
i love to run around him if his here,
being his playful baby..
i woud love to climb on top of him when his soundly asleep and wake him up
i wish to be around him by now...i miss u so badly baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me & My Boo..

it's been a few times he watches me go to sleep through webcam..
but it makes me feel warm and secure when i'm asleep,my body,my mind and my soul are rested safely..
i wish he was here in real life sleeping by my side cuddling me to sleep..
as i feel being without him around my life is like an empty bottle that has nothing in it,hunger for thirst..
i love him so much but i dont know why or what makes me love him that much
but i dont care as i wanna be with him..
Lord made us to be a pair of couple,
he understands me more than anyone does..
he tries his best to make me smile,
and the laughter he brought to me was a gift from him and Lord..
i cant deny his a romantic guy,
tho many things has gone through us and we been throught it together
and loads of path we still need to go on together,
i am nothing now if he wasnt here
as he was the one lighted my life with his candles of light
i love him so much not because of cash
as he isnt the same guy as others
a guy who truely concern about me,cares about me,
tho his younger than me but his way more mature..way way more mature
geez..i love his smile and laughter the most,
i love to laugh whenever he laughs,
i laugh the smiles that was on his face..
i love everything about him..
his mine forever mine..
casey brendon cutright
my love life
my life partner..





signing out by
*kimmybaby*

Introducing My Bf..The One I Love & Then His Ex The One I Hate The Most >_<

So this is it..Me & my bf..Casey Brendon Cutright..
Okok lol,His american and I'm chinese..Not a big deal right..
I'm in love with this guy..Really really in love..Love is Blind..
Lol sometimes I am way too shy to talk to him on the mic
or look at him at the webcam..I don't know why,too too shy.
Lol..He could make me smile easily..what the hell..
How come?Did he use magic?Lol I'm wondering abt it too..
He makes me laugh and smile alot,I do that to him too..
Lalala..I never felt bored everytime I talk to him..
It was just like endless talking..
Jokes,Fights,Teasing & ETC..
We usually have fights but end up laughing sometimes..
But most of the time he tries to hurt himself when I ignore him..
That is so freaking me out..
Darn..Too Loving already right?
Can't help..
Gosh...
Endless Loving Couple..
Sometimes loads of ppl envy us..
I dont know why..
I mean heck u can get your dream ones too..
Darn I'm getting angrier with his ex..
That bimbo bitch,if any of u does go to IMVU for chats..
Be careful with a name call 'lostsurvivorgl'
Tho her name is lostsurvivorgl but I call her
LostPussySlut..
Hate her so much trying to break me from my love..
Damn Her..
Cuz she is the bimbo bitch,who love sex...
OMG,common for god sake,she love sex still want my bf..
Maybe she is pain at the ass..
I don't blame her really..Bcause she really is a mental girl.
But hell she is a good cock sucker..
Trust me,
I don't say it on purpose..
Cuz all this I heard from IMVU guys...
So anyone want free sex or cyber sex..
go to IMVU and look for this girl..
Tho she is married she still looking for nice man..
Darn,Feel like puking now..
Good Cock Sucker huh?
Lucky my man didn't let her touch his..
If not I need to clean it till its pure clean..Lol...

*Lovez KimmyBaby*

Does anyone met their love life partner from the internet or chatting sites??

Has anyone found their love life partner through internets or chatting sites?
I'm wondering and hoping to meet those couples who is fated to meet onlines..
Because as for myself,I think I found my love life partner..
It's all started from a chat site call IMVU (3D chat site if anyone don't know abt it)
Well I was feeling bored one night,it's around 8pm (Malaysia's time)..I was hitting the chat now button..Few chat with me awhile and left and some remain as 1 day friend...Gosh,it was really boring,I wish my friends was on that day,but none was on..As usual,most of my friends are not from my countries..So the time isn't the same then..Never mind,I kept searching for new friends..Kept clicking at the chat now button,Gosh it's getting bored or should i just log out and watch tv?I was thinking abt doing that,just log out and watch tv..But then the last person who accepted my request to chat he was younger than me by 2 years..But then his avatar was cool and yeah mostly you could say it's so handsome!!So I decided to talk to him and yeah who cares how old is he,as long as we can get a good chat or maybe a good friendship..
So here's the guy's avatar's name "Guest_gangstaC101"..Hmm a gangsta??Lol..Never mind let it be..His avatar is damn cute I can admit it and yeah I might fall in love with that avatar if it was real person,jokingly..Tho his avatar was cute and handsome but something wasnt right about him..All i could sence is he was DOWN..totally sad..Poor thing..I was saying to myself..Should I give a try to comfort him?And my answer came to yes..Kay..I was excited talking to him but he wasn't happy at all so I tried my best being as a friend comforting him till he poured out his feelings about his life to me..Darn..It's so sad hearing his life story..I cant say it out here cause it's a private stuff..Well he was trying to kill himself that time..Gosh he kept saying I won't be seeing him ever again and that was the last chat..OMG..I was panic,I kept convincing him..For 2 hours I guess..
At last I manage to convince him and yeah we had a great talk..The next day,
I begin to be his girl..Love at first sight u could say that..I don't know abt him but to me I'm really in love with him..And I slowly begin to get to know him and understand him bit by bit..There is still more I need to understand him..And know him deeply..Its been 2 months now,we are happy couple..Tho his living in USA and I myself living in Malaysia..We communicate using msn & oz now,no more imvu anymore bcause his ex is stalking me and trying to make me dump him..I know she sounds stupid and nuts but u cant deny cause she is having mental problem..
So I can't blame her..My bf is happy now,seeing him happy everyday makes my life brighter..I love to see when he smiles,he has a handsome smile and I love it so much whenever he laugh..Sometimes we both could laugh out loud..Geezz ppl may think we both nuts but we always do hv alot of jokes..Crazy and Best Couple in the world..I love to be with him because he loves to make me smile,I feel warm and I feel good whenever his around..When I dont see him online bcause he needs to sleep,I feel kinda lonely without him,but most of the time I take my nap or do my readings while waiting for him.But when I take my nap,I always cover myself with my thick blanket and most of the time I can feel his warm,and sometimes I do feel that as if he is sleeping beside me hugging me..
Well we are getting marry in two years time..Hope everything going good till the day we are getting marry..I just love him so so much..His mine,forever mine..
Leave me a comment or do ask me questions if u love too..
Tata

*Luv KimmyBaby*